


What You're Looking For

by makemeanybraver



Category: Good Girls (TV)
Genre: Angst, Beth holds Rio in her arms while he cries, Emotional Baggage, F/M, Fluff, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Rio Has PTSD, Rio holds Beth in his arms while she cries, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:47:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24315292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makemeanybraver/pseuds/makemeanybraver
Summary: Beth and Rio get on the path to repairing their situation-ship.
Relationships: Beth Boland/Rio
Comments: 75
Kudos: 158





	1. Torn From My Body

**Author's Note:**

> hi i'm new to this fandom and this will be my first work here! I hope that if you read it, you'll enjoy it. It's basically just all my thoughts on how Beth and Rio's relationship unravels in "season 4." This first chapter here is basically a continuation of the season 3 finale. All work is my own and it is unedited because I'm just doing this for fun. Have fun reading!

"I'll see you soon, yeah?" Rio said as he made his way out. Despite his better judgment he didn't keep walking when she said wait. 

After all the car rides alone, the breaking and entering, the late night drop offs, Beth didn't know why she was about to give him a way out. Maybe it was in her nature to care for people.

"I don't like playing this game of cat and mouse," she said, already expecting him to smile and laugh like she was amusing, but he didn't.

"That a metaphor for?" he asked, clasping his hands together in front of himself and raising his eyebrow.

"Nothing I ever do is good enough for you," she said, exasperated and exhausted. "I went shopping. I sold pills. I sold cars. I printed money. I'm going to sell spas, and it's still not enough. So, if you're really gonna do this, then I'm tired of dragging it out. I'm tired of living in fear. I'm tired of worrying that I'll never see my sisters or my kids again after seeing you," she said, not attempting to hide how she felt because she knew this would be the last words they said to each other. 

"How much longer are you gonna keep putting this on me?" he said quietly, trying not to go soft and feel sorry for her because he knew she didn't need that, but he couldn't help himself sometimes. Quite often, actually.

"It is on you," she yelled at him. "You're the one with the power, right? With the guns, the guys, the van-" she started to say before he cut her off.

"Have some accountability, Elizabeth!" he yelled back now. "All those hustles were your idea. You robbed your local grocery store, twice. I paid you to deliver me those pills, but you just took em for yourself and start selling. You took over your husband's dealership. You asked your co-worker to do dirty work for you. You printed behind everyone's backs. You bought a fucking hot tub retail store just to wash all that money. I didn't tell you to do any of it. I just got on board. So, stop pretending that your reason for it is anything but money."

"It's for my family!" she yelled back, feeling tears of frustration start to sting her eyes.

"Yeah, right, the family that you see less of than me? You could be with them right now, Elizabeth. But you here arguing with me, what for?" he asked, lifting up his chin and looking at her through hooded eyes. He hoped he was still at least a little bit intimidating. He walked forward until he was a foot away from her.

"It's so that you don't kill me... Because I'm not useful to you... Anymore," she whispered as her frustration flowed out of her through tears.

"If I wanted to kill you, I would've taken the opportunity the last 10 times I had it. Kinda like you did. Only I wouldn't have missed," he said. He could only admit it because of the tears. He wanted to reach out and rub them away. He wished he didn't have to cause so much turmoil in her life. He wished she didn't have to either.

She turned her head down and let a sob shake her shoulders, wondering how she ever thought of throwing down so much money just to get rid of him for nothing. She almost didn't want him to leave anymore.

"Tell me, how do I incentivize you now, huh?" he asked gravelly, and when she looked up again he was even closer, and his thumb was closing in until he gently caressed her cheek and wiped away her tears. She looked back up at him through teary eyes and he looked different. She went in between two poles with regards to him, either he gave her a deep, chilling sense of fear or he excited her to her very core. When she looked at him now, she felt something different.

Elizabeth realized that she cared deeply for Rio, despite all their trials and tribulations, and despite how strongly she tried to fight off these feelings or pretend they never existed. He gave her something that she never had before - an opportunity to prove her capabilities. He even proved that she was capable of killing a man, capable of providing for herself, and standing up for herself. For how scared he made her, she didn't feel that he thought of her as lesser. And it would never work out. Not the way that it did with Dean. She and him would never have a family with kids of their own, they wouldn't live in a house together, or go to sleep side by side every night. But then she thought, maybe she didn't want those things, she just thought that she should have them, because that's the picture all the women in her childhood painted for her, and she never thought that she could have something more. Something of her own. Now she knew that she could.

She moved forward and closed the distance, kissing him softly to see if he really meant it, that he never had plans to kill her. He kissed her back, taking her face in both his hands now, and kissing her passionately. It felt like the wrong thing to do, but he was so used to doing bad things that the guilt didn't affect him anymore. These feelings would just have to be another thing to come to terms with.

Rio moved away from her mouth, kissed her cheek, then her jaw, and her neck.

"I'm so, so sorry," Beth said, shoulders beginning to shake again because she was still capable of feeling guilty. "Please, forgive me. Please, please, please," she whispered, shaking in his arms and crying again. She didn't deserve this. Not after putting three bullets in him, training some poor kid to shoot him, and hiring a sniper to kill him, too. He didn't deserve that. All those times that she felt like a hostage, she never really was. 'Cause you don't kill what you love. He just had a really terrible way of showing it. But maybe that wasn't all his fault.

"Stop crying," he said, moving his hands to her shoulders to steady her. "I think we got some issues work through, right, come on," he said, smiling at her in an effort to calm her down and then pulling her into him, wrapping his arms around her and squeezing her. Strangely, this felt like the most intimate act they ever did together. Just a simple hug.

"I got some shit to do tonight, alright. Sorry, I'll... I'll see you soon," he said after letting her go when he felt that she had collected herself a bit more, then headed for the door again.

She nodded, and then remembered. "Wait," she said, again, and wiped her cheeks for the last time. He turned around and looked at her questioningly. "I'll... I'll walk with you to your car," she said, moving to step in front of him and walking out the door first.

"Yeah, 'cause I need you protect me," he said sarcastically, but letting her lead the way for whatever reason. When he took his first step out, she pulled him in for another hug with his back turned away from the window that the sniper was sat at. She shook her head at him to tell him not to do it, just to be sure that he couldn't tell the hit was off by virtue of the hug. Before stepping back entirely, she also kissed him again. She hoped that she could keep doing that, for a long while.

"I'll see you soon," she whispered in his ear before pulling away, and he smiled at her, then they walked together to his car where they departed ways.

\---

After careful consideration of the best way to break the news to her sisters, Beth agreed that a bottle of vodka would probably soften the blow. After sending off a text to Annie and Ruby to meet at Annie's to update them about the hitman, she stopped by the liquor store to pick up a bottle. She spent every second in between getting in her car and knocking on Annie's front door thinking over and over again if she had made the right choice. Ruby was already there when Beth made it, and they looked extremely anxious.

"So?" Ruby asked, desparate to know.m

Annie added on, "what happened?"

Beth poured three shots and implored them to drink first. The air settled thickly around them, and she almost didn't even want to tell them now but they knew it was scheduled to happen about thirty minutes ago.

"I called it off," she said quietly, unprepared for their reactions.

"You did what?" Annie yelled, standing up from her couch and stomping, before she remembered that Ben was probably trying to go to sleep in his room.

"Wait, so he was ready... And you just, called it off? Why, Beth?" Ruby asked, looking at her like she was crazy.

"It was a really intense conversation-" Beth started to say before Annie interrupted.

"Yeah, and it's gonna keep being that way until he's gone, sis. Why did you call it off?" Annie argued now more quietly.

"Listen, okay, he said that- that he never planned to kill me. He was never going to do it. I... I think he just wanted me to think that so that I would work harder," Beth tried explaining.

"You realize how insane you're being right now, Beth. He lied to you," Ruby said, looking at her with such judgement.

"No, no, he didn't. Look, you two, don't understand. Okay? I... I was there and I could tell he meant it," Beth argued.

"No, no I don't understand. Why were you even talking to him about him killing you?" Annie wondered, and Beth didn't get a chance to answer before Ruby answered for her.

"You gave his ass a second chance? Seriously?" Ruby questioned. 

"Well, he has given us dozens of chances. So, he deserves a second chance, doesn't he?" Beth said, knowing as soon as the words left her mouth that nobody would buy it.

"Do you hear yourself right now?" Annie asked, looking at her sister like she had grown two heads.

"You two aren't listening to me. You don't have to agree with me, okay? But you have to understand. Okay, I... I shot him. I put three bullets in him and maybe it was a crime of passion or whatever, but I just ran away. I said nothing. I pretended like it didn't happen until he popped back up again. So, I think, maybe, he was entitled to be angry at me. I couldn't do it again. If he really wasn't going to kill me, then he just... He didn't deserve it," Beth tried explaining, but was once again with dubious looks.

"Okay, well, what about everything else he's done? He killed Lucy, I'm pretty sure he killed Turner, and he was with someone else, Beth," Ruby argued.

Beth was silent for a moment before responding. "It's not for us to judge him. We have done our fair share of bad things, and it wasn't all because of him. He doesn't deserve to die. If we do that, especially if we pay someone else to do the dirty work, we're no better than what we make him out to be," she said, resigning with a sign, knowing that her sisters were never going to agree with her.

"Well, how are you just going to move on from this? How are things ever going to get better?" Annie wondered.

"He said he wanted to work things out," Beth sighed, leaning down and putting her head in Ruby's lap. Ruby put her hand on Beth's arm and started stroking her hair. She could tell something was up by the way Beth was acting.

"Okay, there's something you're not telling us. Spill," Ruby ordered.

"I started crying and he put his hands on my shoulders. He calmed me down. Hugged me," she started saying.

"Gangfriend snuggled you?" Annie asked not even believing it.

"Yeah. He kissed me too. He even wiped away my tears. I mean, I looked at him today and for the first time, I saw real emotions and real feelings. I think back to when we were together. It was never right. I mean, the first time I invited him into a bathroom at a bar, and I left with my husband without saying anything to him. The second time I told him he had to leave before my kids saw him. How do you think that made him feel?" Beth asked, starting get tears at the corner of her eyes, which she quickly wiped away.

"Cheap," Ruby voluntereed an answer. "Dirty." "Like a sex toy that didn't matter to you," Ruby and Annie said back and forth.

"Maybe he said I was just work because... Because he didn't want to get hurt. He didn't want me to hurt him. I know it sounds crazy," Beth laughed through her tears. "Trust me, I know. But I really, really care about him. He makes me feel alive. Like I'm more than just a housewife or a mother of four. I want to work things out with him," Beth said, closing her eyes.

"Good luck," Annie replied quietly which earned her a scowl from Ruby.

"Do you love him?" Ruby asked softly.

"No," Beth said immediately, scrunching up her nose. "Maybe... I mean, I don't know," she said again after giving the question more than a moment's thought. "Maybe he loves me," she said, wondering what the future held.

"I... I think I can help," Annie said cautiously. "Do you think you would want to go to therapy?" she asked. 

"Therapy... I don't think Rio would do that..." Beth said.

"You two aren't exactly the best at communication. I don't think that you can work through everything on your own," Ruby said, and Annie resisted celebrating the fact that Ruby thought she came up with a good idea.

"I'll get a recommendation from Josh. Just bring it up to him, yeah?" Annie suggested.


	2. Start Believing In Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth and Rio go on a date.

Beth put on a cute outfit and did her make up, almost forgetting that she wasn't doing it to tease or manipulate Rio. She wanted to look good for him. She got butterflies in her stomach--as she often did for a variety of different reasons when it came to Rio--while she waited for him in the corner booth. She ordered his favorite sandwich, the one with potatoes in the middle, and a black coffee for him. She was starting worry that it would get cold. Rio was usually very punctual--it was one of his best qualities--but he was now ten minutes late. Just as Beth started feeling sick like she may have been stood up without as much of phone call, the little bell at the front entrance of the diner rang, announcing Rio's grand entrance.

As he walked toward her, Beth wondered if he put much thought into how he looked or if he naturally had that much fashion sense and sex appeal. She wondered if maybe he wanted to look good for her. He was late because he kept going back and forth on what jacket he should wear, and whether he should leave his piercing in or take it out.

"Sorry I'm late," he said, as a courtesy before taking his seat across from her. He paused while looking her up and down, noting how attractive she looked. He wondered what she wanted now. "Spa business slow on the first week?" He asked, guessing if she looked like that again, it was to beg him for another extension on repayment.

"No, actually. We're making about the same number of sales that the store was making daily before I took over... For an even higher profit," she said, smiling as she tooted her own horn.

"Impressive," he said, by way of congratulating her before tucking into his sandwich. She watched him eat with a bemused smile on her face as she also had a few bites of food. "So, you got a new idea already?" he asked curiously, surprised that she had something new planned and the spa business had just started.

Beth laughed, now sharing her smile with him. Rio leaned back in the booth, picked up his coffee mug, smirking behind the cup and not speaking again until he took a gulp and set the mug back down. "You gon' let me know what's on your mind then, Elizabeth?" he asked, smiling and wondering what was up with Beth.

"I can ask you to get breakfast with me without needing to talk about business," she pointed out. Watching as Rio tucked back into his sandwich, apparently not satisfied with that answer and evidently ignoring it.

"Damn good sandwich," he said quietly after he put it back down. He'd be wrong to say that it didn't give him a funny feeling that she remembered what his favorite thing to eat on this menu is, and ordered it for him ahead of time.

"It's a date," she clarified, scrunching up her nose and nodding, miffed by the look of surprise on Rio's face.

"Don't you ask someone out for it to be a date? Not just spring one on em?" Rio asked, laughing at her declaration.

"I chose to spring one on you. That way you can't back out," she said, exposing her motives made Rio smile back at her like he always did when he found her funny.

"Why would I back out of a date with Elizabeth of Boland Bubbles?" Rio teased.

"So, you think this is a date?" Beth asked sarcastically.

"Yeah, okay. You'll get my breakfast then?" Rio said, staring at her at the same time he took another gulp of coffee.

Beth giggled and followed suit, keeping up the staring contest while she ate. "I love Rom-Coms," Beth volunteered after a long pause. "You know like When Harry Met Sally... Sleepless in Seattle..." Beth rambled.

"Rom-coms? Me too," he said, which surprised Beth.

"Really? What's your favorite?" she asked, actually intrigued now because she didn't expect that answer. She thought he'd be more interested in something like the Fast and Furious movies or something.

"Brokeback Mountain," he answered, smiling at himself when she laughed out loud at his response.

"That's not funny," she said while still giggling.

"Made you laugh," he said.

"No, no. I mean, that's not a comedy. It's a drama," she said, resting her hand on her chin while eying him up and down. They paused again to eat their food and Beth finally worked up the courage to ask him about the therapy. "I think we should see a therapist," she said, small smile on her face still, hoping that he would have a good reaction.

"Therapy..." he said, scrunching his eyebrows together and losing eye contact with her, chosing instead to stare down at his plate with his last bites of sandwich.

Beth was ready for him to get defensive. "Therapy is really great for your mental health, you know. It's important to talk about things. There is no shame in seeing a therapist to help you work through issues," she said, by way of encouraging him to agree with her.

"It's not the idea of therapy. My cousin's therapist," he shrugged, sipping his coffee and still not making eye contact. Usually his gaze never left her eyes when they were together. Unless he wanted to look at something else... on her body. But he didn't usually avoid her gaze like this. He finished off his sandwich.

"Your cousin's a therpist?" she questioned, sounding very surprised now.

"Just because I do what I do doesn't mean my whole extended family are criminals," he argued, now sounding actually defensive.

"I know," she replied immediately. "Yeah, I know. I know... What do I need to say to convince you then?" Beth asked sincerely.

"How are we gonna talk to a therapist without lying about everything, Elizabeth?" he questioned.

That was something she hadn't thought of. They obviously couldn't tell a therapist anything about how she shot him or why she was always in debt to him or how he constantly threatened her. "I don't know... We'll... Speak in metaphors. I don't know, Rio, but I want to work through our issues, and I don't think we'll get anywhere if we do it on our own. Do you... Do you want work this out?" she asked gently, not knowing what she would even say if he said no or that he didn't care.

He thought about it for a brief second more, and he was honestly touched that Beth saw a future with him where they weren't carrying all this baggage. Honestly surprised that for how hard he tried pushing her away, Beth apparently still wanted a relationship with him. He didn't think that he could try to push his feelings for her down anymore. He didn't think that he wanted to.

Rio took out his wallet and dropped three ten dollar bills on the table. "Text me when and where," he said while standing up.

"I asked you on the date, I'll get your food for you," she said, pushing the money back towards him so he would pick it back up.

"A man never lets his girl pay the bill," he said, smirking at her before pushing the money back towards her. "Let me know," he said before walking away, touching her shoulder as he made his way to the exit door.

\---

When Josh asked Annie what kind of issues her sister and her partner were having, in order to give her a better recommendation, Annie was all kinds of stumped. She didn't know where to begin or if she should bring back up the whole eye cancer thing. After a really long time that she just sat there staring at Josh, she thought she really should just come up with something. "It's complicated," she said, which, yeah, true.

"Really like the most complicated relationship I've ever seen. Like our thing looks simple compared to... Okay, anyway, what I mean is that... Before my sister got eye cancer, things were pretty okay between them. But once the whole eye cancer thing started happening... He became distant and she got upset... So... Now that it's in remission, they want to work it out..." Annie replied cryptically, hoping that Josh wouldn't pry any further.

"So, intimacy issues, inability to cope with conflict. Is there any history of abuse?" Josh asked, and Annie nodded. "That couple be described as, physical, emotional, sexual?"

"Um, well, she-she physically abused him and he kinda emotionally abuses her... You're not gonna tell the therapist this, right?" she asked cautiously, hoping that she didn't give away anything the 'couple' might not want a therapist to know yet.

"No, they can tell the therapist their story. But I know someone who has helped multiple couples with abusive history and difficulty bonding. She's Claire Rosenbloom. Have your sister Google her and maybe consider her," Josh said, handing Annie a slip of paper with Dr. Rosenbloom's name on it.

\---

Beth was sitting on her blow-up bed later that night, researching Dr. Rosenbloom. She had a website with a biography, some introductory videos, reviews, and a q&a. _How do we decide that we need couples counseling? How do we pick a therapist? What should we expect in our first session?_ Many of the reviews said that Dr. Rosenbloom helped them work out abusive pasts in their relationship, figure out better coping methods for conflict, and learn how to connect on a more intimate level. All very promising ideas.

Her phone rang while she was in the process of scheduling a phone appointment. It was him.

"Crime movies." Rio said as soon as she picked up, not even starting with hello. Beth leered her eyes, as if he could see her.

"Huh?" she asked in confusion.

"My favorite movie genre. Like, The Godfather, and The Godfather Part 2," he said, smiling as he leaned against his car. He was at the carwash, waiting for the last payment. Elizabeth was right, though he didn't like to admit it, so he wasn't gonna run any more funny money through it after this last payment. Mick was inside getting it for him.

Beth giggled. "Of course it is. Say the line," she ordered.

"The line?" Rio asked, feigning ignorance.

"Please. I wanna hear you say it," she begged now, and of course that's what got the line out of him.

Rio was silent on his end for a few seconds and Beth thought he wouldn't do it. And then: "I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse," he said in his best Corleone impression, smiling as that got even more giggles out of Beth.

"Okay, Marlon Brando. Do you have time for short phone call with a therapist tomorrow morning? They suggest that you should talk with them before scheduling an in-person session, so that you can see if they're a good fit," Beth explained, smile still on her face.

"Text me the number. They gonna ask me questions?" Rio asked.

"No, this part is for you to learn about her. Her philosophy and her style. How she likes to help people," Beth explained. Just then was when Dean opened the door and came into the room. He stayed back late at the store to work on some displays and new shipments. When he walked in, he asked who she was on the phone with. Beth pulled the phone away from her mouth and said it was Annie.

"Yeah, okay. I'll let you know how it goes," Rio said, then watching Mick walk out of the manager's room with two dufflebags. "And I'll talk to you tomorrow," he said, going around to the passenger side of the car to get the door for Mick.

"Okay, bye," she said, and then hung up. She kept her answers brief when Dean inquired about the phone call and Annie.


	3. Spiders in the Attic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth and Rio start couples counseling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Disclaimer that Ive never had couples counseling and i dont know how accurate this portrayal might be to the real world. I did some research into it to see the questions therapists might ask but still this is obviously entirely fictional and made up all because I love Beth and Rio COMMUNICATING FOR ONCE! 
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy the story. I also want to thank the fandom real quick. I've written fic for tons of fandoms in the past but Ive never had so much feedback before. I really appreciate all the kudos, comments and hits. If you wanna follow me on tumblr, please do so, I'll follow back! onemore-light.tumblr.com

Dr. Rosenbloom let them into her office and started with what she called an 'easy question.'

"How did you two meet?" she asked, crossing her legs as the couple took their seats on her couch. Right at the start, both Beth and Rio had to take a step back. Because this wasn't a story worth reminiscing about on anniversaries, recounting at a wedding, or telling to children. Beth wasn't proud of what she had done--stealing all of Rio's money from the grocery store. Rio knew that. It wasn't like he expected her to be proud or to look back on that moment happily. But he did wonder if this was just a waste of time because no matter what their relationship was doomed to fail. 

Beth wondered if she would ever be able to let go of the resentment she had built up for him because of how much her life had changed ever since she met him. When they looked at each other, though, they knew that this wasn't something that was going to be easy to let go of, and they thought maybe it was even worth fighting for.

"Well... I was looking for an investor in my business. A friend of mine told me that Christopher was looking for opportunities," Beth said, looking for a moment at Rio and seeing something in his eyes that reassured her he wasn't just doing this for no reason. That he really wanted her. 

They talked about how Beth owned a car dealership, but now owns a spa retail store. How Rio started multiple small businesses in his local community and branched out to help Elizabeth. How they are still business partners.

"It's extremely common for couples that work together to have a hard time striking a balance between work and pleasure. Do you think that causes issues for you, Christopher?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked.

"Yeah. When we met, you know, she was trying to expand the dealership. Start gettin' in and sellin' luxury cars, sports cars. I invested a lot of money and haven't seen the return that I expected," Rio explained, going along with the story but giving up as much as he needed to so that Dr. Rosenbloom would get the basic gist of the problem.

"Does working with your partner cause issues for you, Elizabeth?" the therapist asked next.

Beth cleared her throat before speaking. "Yeah... It does. Sometimes, I feel like he sets his expectations for the business too high. I don't like letting him down," she answered.

Dr. Rosenbloom asked if Christopher had anything to say in response. He propped his elbow up on his knee and rested his chin on his hand, going back and forth as to how much of himself he should reveal. He blinked rapidly and sucked in his breath before talking again.

"I have high expectations because I know that you're capable of meeting them, if you work hard enough and you're honest with me," Rio said, looking at Dr. Rosenbloom while he explained it to Beth.

"Is it hard for you to share your feelings on this with Elizabeth?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked.

Rio nodded wordlessly, and Dr. Rosenbloom asked why.

"Because if she thinks I'm going easy on her then she won't work as hard," Rio said.

"As a couple, you have a different dynamic than typical co-workers, which means it may be better for your relationship and for the business to treat her differently than you would other people who work for you. What do you think of what Rio said, Elizabeth?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked.

"I disagree with him. I think that if you were more supportive and accommodating, we wouldn't argue as much. I'll work hard either way," she said.

"Christopher, do you trust her to do what she says?" the therapist asked, and Rio said no. 

"Can you tell me more about your upbringing, Christopher?" she asked again, and again Rio said no. Dr. Rosenbloom nodded and wrote down on her notepad to come back to that later once Christopher opened up more. 

"Alright, let's talk about the issue that has led you to seek couples counseling," Dr. Rosenbloom asked, apparently leaving the question open for either of them to answer.

"A while back, I hit Christopher. After that, everything changed. But I want him to trust me again," Beth admitted, and Rio looked at her surprised, because he didn't think that she was going to admit to that.

Dr. Rosenbloom asked Rio if what she said was true and he nodded his head, then she asked again if he still wanted to be with Beth even after she hit him.

"I wouldn't be sitting here if I didn't," Rio responded sarcastically, and the therapist looked back at him with a smile before asking her next question.

"How did you cope with Elizabeth hurting you, physically?" she asked.

Rio thought back to what happened with Turner, to walking in on Beth dancing in her kitchen, to handing her the bullets, to giving her the gun that his guy shot Lucy with. "Not well," he said.

"How did you cope with it, Elizabeth?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked, which Beth wasn't expecting.

Beth took a second to think before answering. "I felt very confused. I was relieved because we reached a point where I thought I really didn't want him in my life, and that made him go away for a little while. But I also felt so guilty and I... Missed him. I didn't understand why, but I missed him. So, I started seeing someone else..." she said, and just as much as the therapist studied her, she also studied Rio, and didn't miss the eye roll when Beth said her last sentence.

Dr. Rosenbloom asked what he thought when he learned that she started seeing someone else. Rio wanted to let the therapist know that she was lying. A big lie. When he looked at Beth, she looked distraught. Rio simply didn't know what to say, so that's what he told the therapist.

"Did it make you angry?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked, and Rio nodded his head. "Did it make you sad?" she asked again, and this time Rio stared into her eyes, unable to come up with answer that he could express to anyone outside of his head. 

"Elizabeth is here to earn your trust back. Why are you here, Christopher?" the therapist asked, hoping that she could get a more honest answer now that she has had him think about how he felt about the abuse.

Rio leaned back on the couch and folded his arms. "What can I do? I did everything I could to hate her. She's under my skin," he said, turning to look at Elizabeth and he had a sick sort of feeling, but not exactly. Maybe it felt sick because he had forgotten what love felt like. He twisted his rings on his left hand around and around, unable to sit still.

Dr. Rosenbloom knew that he wanted to say more, but couldn't think of how to say it. She wrote down again that this was something to come back to. "Why did you do it, Elizabeth?" she asked, and Beth looked back at her with a questioning look. "Why did you hit him?"

"I felt like I sacrificed so much for him and for our business. I felt really out of control and powerless. I blamed him for it, for how much he pushes me and makes things hard for me. I just felt like I couldn't take it anymore, so I lashed out," Beth explained.

"Did hitting him solve your problems?" the therapist asked.

"No," Beth said. "It just made everything worse. I wish that I never did it, that I could take it back and make it so that never happened," she said, her voice starting to tremble. "And I'm really sorry. I should have never let it get that far," she said, covering her face as she started to cry again. She reached her other hand out to rest on Rio's knee and she leaned into him, starting to cry on his shoulder.

"Hey, it wasn't all you. I shouldn't have put you in that position," Rio said, turning to face her and pushing her hair out of her eyes before wiping her cheeks. The therapist pulled out a box of kleenex and handed her a few. She noted that Rio didn't say he forgave her.

"My role here is to help you both talk to each other and learn ways to better support and love each other. Your roles are to desire that change," the therapist said. "Say you have spiders in your attic. If you're both on board, I can help you clean out the spiders," she said, and both Elizabeth and Christopher nodded at her.

"I like to leave my clients with assignments to do before our next meeting. And it's not usually boring homework. We're scheduled to meet again in seven days. Before that happens, I want you both to go out together and do something that you enjoyed before this issue came up. Don't talk about your business. Talk and tell me what you talked about when I see you next," Dr. Rosenbloom said, scribbling down more notes about the session as a whole.


	4. My Pride Is Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth and Rio meet up for a talk at sunset by the bay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peep the emotional baggage tag because it is HEAVY this chapter.

Rio pulled into a parking spot and stopped the car with a sigh, glad to see that Beth still hadn't arrived. He skimmed his hand across his head while he kept overthinking about how this would go, what he would say, and what she would say.

"Kinda a romantic spot," Mick commented, and Rio just hummed in response, fully expecting Mick's disapproval. Rio told Mick that they were gonna meet Beth for another drop off, but instead of the usual spot by the park, Rio had driven them down to Belle Isle. They were on the bay and the spot looked over the city with all its lights on as the sun was less than a half hour from setting. Very romantic.

If it was up to Rio, then Mick would've just stayed home. But his doctor said he shouldn't be driving by himself for a while incase he suddenly got numb again. Thankfully, the numbness came very fleetingly now so it was safe to drive with 'supervision.'

"Rio, I know I said I love you, but I meant as a brother," Mick said, making Rio laugh.

"Keep it 'till tomorrow. Pick me up in the morning," Rio said, smiling.

"And where would I find you?" Mick asked.

"My place," Rio answered, and when Mick expressed doubt, he reassured him. "I'll see you at my place tomorrow."

"Que sigues haciendo con ella? Casi mueres por ella," Mick spoke seriously, as a friend. He asked what he was still doing with her, after he almost died because of her.

"No se va de mi mente," Rio said quietly, she won't get out of my head. He tightened his grip on the steering wheel and dropped his hands to his lap when he felt his fingers squeeze the leather. "Yo lo manejo. I'll see you tomorrow," Rio said he would take handle it, then opened his door and got out. Mick went around to the driver's seat and pulled away as Rio walked up to the lake shore. He took a seat on a bench under a tree, and shoved his hands in his jacket pockets while he waited for her. He watched the water for a few seconds, then shut his eyes, listened to the traffic on the other side of the bay.

Rio didn't know how long it had been until Beth showed up and sat down next to him. "You look peaceful," she remarked before he opened his eyes to look at her. "It's a beautiful view," she said, looking out into the bay. It was dark then, the only light coming from the moon and the stars, and the skyscrapers and cars across the water. The water looked peaceful too.

Rio looked over at her. "Yeah," he said. "It is."

"It's been a while since I've been to Sunset Point with a guy. This was Annie's favorite hook-up spot in high school. Probably still is," Beth said, chuckling.

"We came here to hook up?" Rio asked sarcastically.

Beth laughed. "Dr. Rosenbloom said to do something we enjoyed..." Beth smirked, making Rio smile bemusedly.

"Yeah, we never had much of social life together, did we?" Rio asked.

"Next time, we should go dancing somewhere. Do you know how to dance?" Beth asked, already imagining Rio's hands on her waist.

"'Course I know how to dance. Do you?" Rio asked.

"I'd love for you to teach me," she spoke softly.

"We need to talk about what this is. We've had enough time to think it over," Rio said, speaking more seriously now, giving her a piercing glance.

"I'm your girl," Beth said, shrugging her shoulders.

Rio moved his gaze from her out to the water. He clenched his jaw, feeling extremely frustrated that she couldn't just read his mind. "I'm not gonna be your boyfriend if you're gonna stay with him..." he said, clenching his fists tightly in his pockets.

Beth paused for a second. "I didn't think that mattered much to you," she said, letting go of the breath she was holding in.

"You don't make sense," he said, looking down at his feet.

"Okay, I can't read your mind. Tell me what you mean. Talk to me," she begged, getting bored of his vague and confusing statements.

"You thought this was more than just business? You made it that way. Inviting me into a bathroom at a bar. Taking me home and then telling me to sneak out the door. The whole time you're still with him. That's a fucked up way of showing someone they matter to you," Rio said, refusing to meet her eyes.

"So... so you get back at me by letting me get set up for murder? Not helping me at all?" Beth complained, and Rio grew even more frustrated because she wasn't listening to him. "If you just told me before, we could have talked about it," Beth said.

"You wouldn't have done it anyway... We both know that I was just fantasy for you because your husband doesn't fuck you like I do. Took the guilt of shooting me for you to figure how you really felt for me, didn't it?" Rio said.

"No," she said forcefully. "Actually, I signed divorce papers right before Turner started investigating me and my girls for Boomer's murder. We explained to the kids and everything. I was going to tell you, but the next time I saw... you just came back from Legoland. We called it off since then," Beth explained argumentatively.

Beth looked at him, and he just looked so enraged.

"Why didn't you just tell me sooner?" he spit out.

"I wanted to surprise you! And it was more than just a fantasy, okay? I was confused! I thought I was happy in my marriage and then I found out all the shit my husband was hiding from me. I stumbled into some gang activity when all I wanted was to save my house so that I could keep a roof over my kids' heads. I met you and my life completely changed! So, yes, it was hard for me to understand how I felt for you, but it was never, never just a fantasy!" Beth yelled, standing up from the bench and stomping away from him towards the edge of the water.

"Do you think this hasn't affected me? I keep building up debt because you always come to me with excuses for why you can't pay me. I'm constantly having to do your dirty work because you can't understand that when you're a boss, you have to do shit that you don't want to do sometimes. I almost died! I couldn't feel my arm for weeks. I can't even go for a ride alone because my hand still goes numb sometimes and I could lose control of my car. I can't sleep because I lose my breath and I feel the fucking pain every night! I know I pushed you! I know I made things hard for you, but you made a choice that night to shoot me three times! So, I'm sorry for not crawling back to you or forgiving you, but you haven't exactly made anything easy for me either!" Rio screamed loud enough for his throat to hurt and his chest start to heave. 

He wanted to yell more because he didn't usually talk about how he felt like this and mostly dealt with his emotions by taking them out on people that he needed to get something from. But he couldn't because he was quickly losing his breath and felt like he was spiraling out of control and he started to cry. Tears poured out of him and he wasn't even weeping, but he was gulping, trying to get more air in. He watched Beth come closer to him and lift his arms to wrap her arms around his torso, but one of his arms just slid down her back and laid still by his side. He realized that he couldn't feel it. He wished he couldn't feel anything, but he did, he felt everything except for his arm. He felt pain, remorse, anger, confusion, and frustration. He started feeling dizzy so he closed his eyes and tried focusing on the contact between his feet and the ground. 

Once he felt like his breath was back in his body, he could concentrate how she felt, with her hands rubbing his back, her nose buried in the crook of his neck, her body against his, and his face nuzzled in her hair. Beth's hair was getting wet. 

"I didn't know," she whispered, her lips soft against his neck. 

"You never asked," he grumbled, squeezing her tightly with the arm that he could feel. Finally, he stopped hearing his heart beat in his ears. He felt calm. 

She stepped back so she could speak to him now, at a more reasonable volume. 

"I meant it, I wish I could go back and make a different choice, but I can't change the past. I'm sorry for what I did. I'll get a divorce if that's what I need to do to get you to understand. I'll do it. I never knew how bad I hurt you and I didn't know how bad you would hurt me. I didn't like being afraid of you and wondering when you were going to get your revenge on me. I couldn't sleep either. I couldn't forget how it felt when you pressed a gun against my neck. I got sick everytime I thought of what would happen to my kids if I disappeared and they had no idea what happened to me. You wanted me to hurt like you did, and it worked. I'll do what you ask but you have to do something for me too. Give me back my crap so my kids can leave my mother in law's house and come to live with me again. Please," she said, trying her best to keep a level head through everything she had to say because she didn't want to see him get so angry again. 

"Okay... It's all in storage lockers. I'll get my guys to start putting it back tomorrow," he said, his voice coming out rough and hoarse. He probably would lose it entirely come morning. 

"Rio, I want to make this right," she said, moving to hold his hand. She squeezed it tight in her grasp and after a few seconds, he started squeezing back. It felt like pins and needles, but at least it felt. 

"It's late," Rio said, and they agreed. She told him that she would drive him home and he directed her to his new apartment. She took this as a good sign already, because she hasn't been to where he lives ever since the shooting. When they get there, Rio gets out of the mini van, fighting the urge to ask Beth to come inside with him and Beth lets him go resisting the impulse to ask to come inside.


	5. Retrace Every Wrong Move

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth ends it with Dean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for clicking on my story again! I hope you enjoy it.

The first stop was the storage lockers. Mick knew what was in those storage lockers and he knew who Rio talked with yesterday. His curiosity compelled him to ask Rio how it went down, but he knew that Rio wouldn't talk about it if he asked. So, Mick kept his mouth shut and drove Rio to the storage lockers. Mick stood in the hall while Rio lifted the doors to each storage locker. There were ten, all filled with everything in Beth's kitchen, her kids' bedrooms, her living room, and, yes, her office. It was the sixth one that Rio opened, and then he started opening the drawers. In the bottom left one, he found what he needed, at the bottom of the drawer underneath a bunch of receipts, bank statements, and tax forms. It was a slim pack of papers, clipped together, that read "joint complaint for dissolution of marriage" at the top.

Rio flipped through the pages, seeing that all the names and information was filled out electronically. There was a section that read "Wife seeks name change from Elizabeth Irene Boland to Elizabeth Irene Marks." There were initials at the bottom of each page and four signatures on the last page. All dated just days before Rio was shot. He almost couldn't believe his eyes. He took the packet in his hands and walked out to the hall, then showed the papers to Mick.

"Last page," Rio commented, urging Mick to flip to the last page. His eyes widened in surprise. When he looked back up at Rio, Rio was smiling. "Call the guys and tell them to start moving everything back in. We gotta drop this off," he said as he took the papers back and tucked them safely under his arm.

\---

Beth and Dean returned home that night to their old living room. Dean took a look around, not believing his eyes, his old life returning to him like magic. They took more steps forward and saw that their old kitchen was back too. Their dining room and their office. On top of the kitchen counter was a pack of papers, Beth reached them before Dean did as he was still looking around, dumbfounded and sick. Beth was hoping to see another note with her name on top, but there wasn't one. There really didn't need to be. The papers spoke for themselves.

"Why did he do this?" Dean marveled, opening up boxes on the kitchen floor that he realized contained plates, cups, forks, knives. "What did you say to him?" he asked now in a more accusatory tone.

Beth knew that if she wanted to be trusted again, she had to hold up her end of the deal. "I want to be with Rio," she said, staring fiercely at Dean. She was prepared for how he would try to talk her out of it, and she knew that she wasn't going to let herself be persuaded.

"You slept with him again?" Dean questioned angrily, taking a step closer to her.

"No, actually I didn't. We started therapy together," Beth said, not backing down though Dean was standing over her like he could intimidate her.

"Therapy? Wh-" he started to say before she interrupted.

"I want a divorce, Dean. And you know that it's not all because of him. The truth is that we should have split up a long time ago," Beth argued.

"Why would you start going to therapy with another man and not tell me? Beth, I thought we were past this. You looked me in the eye and you told me that we could wait to finalize the divorce. I thought that we were trying to work through this together," Dean complained.

"Do you think sleeping with Gayle is how you 'work through this' with me?" Beth yelled at him. "Goddammit, Dean. I am tired of your bullshit! It's boring. You're full of regret one day and doing more shit that you'll regret the next day. Pick a different hobby, Dean! Do you know what working through this with me looks like? It looks like going to therapy. It looks like talking to me about what made you so unhappy and giving me a chance to make it up to you. It looks like taking accountability for what you did and trying to make it up to me too! It's not turning the other cheek and hoping that all of our problems vanish into thin air because they won't! And now they never will," Beth yelled as she slammed her hand on the counter and pushed the papers towards Dean.

"You're crazy!" Dean yelled back.

"I'm crazy?" Beth asked enraged, shoving Dean backward and making his leg collide with a box on the ground. When she looked at him now, she struggled to understand what she ever saw in him. She felt like so many years were simply wasted. She loved her kids to death, but the man standing before her was a different story. Her eyes bore holes into his skull. She looked like she had half a mind to put her fingers around his neck and suffocate him. Did he not hear himself all those times that he belittled her? He painted her with broad strokes, little complexity, no depth, no feeling. The painting was in ashes now.

"Yes, yes you are crazy! Because you-you're leaving me for some gang banger with neck tattoos who has shot me, almost killed me, and stolen everything I- we own! You can't do this, Beth!" Dean pleaded with her, throwing the papers to the ground, pointing his finger at her, and looking at her as if she was some sort of monster simply because she refused to bow to his demands. He called her crazy. Rio called her a boss. She could be both.

"You don't own me, Dean! He did not steal me from you. You brought this upon yourself and you only have yourself to blame! I am done pretending to be the quiet and submissive housewife that lives to support her husband. That is not who I am. We are going to go down to the courthouse tomorrow and we will deliver them to the clerk together and then we are done. We are over. And you will not find a way to get me to change my mind," Beth said decisively before bending over to pick up the papers.

Dean stared back at her with his nose flared and his fists tightly clenched. He reared his foot back and kicked the box on the ground, hard. They could both hear the shattering of the ceramic dishes in the box. Dean huffed then marched out without saying another word. Once he was out the front door, Beth grabbed onto the kitchen counter until her knuckles turned white and she screamed 'fuck' as hard as he could out into the empty house. Beth grunted as she tried getting a hold of herself before going over to the front door and locking it. As if that mattered anyway.

Beth walked back into her office and sighed when she saw that Rio had also returned her the bottle of bourbon she was working on before he took everything. She picked it up and came to the kitchen for a cup to pour herself a double. The burn down her throat was a welcome distraction from her thoughts that replayed the phrase "you're crazy" over and over. At least she wasn't killing herself wondering what this meant for her relationship with her babies. Though that would certainly come later.

As soon as Beth plopped herself down on her couch, she took out her phone and called the only person she knew could make this better. While the line rang, she started to cry quietly, and she didn't stop when the line stopped ringing. She just cried quietly into the phone. Her fears and doubts flowed out of her, soaking the top of her shirt. It wasn't until her name was repeated the fourth time that she could gather the strength and courage to speak.

"I'm okay. I'm alright. I'm just... You would tell me if I'm making a mistake right?" Beth asked, her voice shaking.

She heard an exhausted sigh of relief. "Beth, everyone in the world could have a different opinion of what you should do and how you should live. But you don't have to listen to any of us. You can make your own choice, and whatever happens, you just have to learn to live with it," Ruby spoke gently, wishing she could extend herself through the phone and reach over to hug Beth.

Beth sniffled before aggressively wiping the tears off her face. "I'm scared, Ruby..." she wept. Beth couldn't quite put into words what she was scared of. Losing her kids was definitely one thing. Losing the house. Losing her reputation. Falling in love with Rio and losing him again.

"Hey, Beth, it's okay. I'm with you no matter what. Do you need me to come over, or you can come here?" Ruby offered, totally ready to take her in.

"No... No, you're with Stan for the night. I'll be okay. I promise. Ruby, I love you," Beth said, sniffling again.

"Alright. Just tell me if you need anything, honey. I love you too," Ruby said before they hung up.

Beth sighed before gulping down the last few sips of bourbon and sinking deep into her couch. She wanted to sleep, but it evaded her as she wondered how she could face Rio knowing that this was the least of her problems with his trust issues. Lying came natural to her like breathing, but she couldn't lie anymore. She couldn't risk losing him again because, despite the turmoil and confusion, her life was sweeter when she had his adoration. When he looked at her like she was worth being desired and respected. If she thought about it for a second longer, she would convince herself not to say anything. She would fool herself into thinking that it would just go away and she would never have to face the consequences. That would only make it worse when the inevitable happened. It was time to rip the band-aid off. 

Her finger hovered over the call button for a brief moment before she pressed it. Rio's voice on the other end brought her both a sense of comfort and dread. He said hello and instead of answering in kind, she swallowed the lump in her throat and said, "I've lied to you." 

Rio was silent on the other end for a few seconds. "Are you going to lie again?" he asked. He could tell that she had been crying because she was slightly out of breath and her voice was shaking. She was vulnerable. 

"I was never pregnant and I... I tried convincing Max to kill you, but he couldn't do it. Then, I hired someone to kill you... He was going to do it that night when we were together at the store, but I told him not to. It's why I was stealing from you before, to pay him. And I, I broke it off with Dean for good," she explained, wishing he was here for her to tell him face to face because he usually didn't say much and she had slowly started to learn how to read his emotions in his facial expressions. When he didn't say anything for over half a minute, she asked, "are you mad?"

"Yeah," he replied immediately. "I'll get over it," he mumbled. 

She sniffled. "I don't want to lie to you anymore," she promised. 

"I don't want you to lie to me anymore either," he said, before hanging up abruptly. Finally, Beth felt calm enough to sleep.


	6. I Know I Made a Mark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mick third-wheels, then Beth and Rio go back for another therapy session.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suppose I should've done this before but  
> This chapter's title comes from "Mark the Graves" by Linkin Park.  
> Chapter five's title comes from "Easier to Run" by Linkin Park.  
> Chapter four's title comes from "Points of Authority" by Linkin Park.  
> Chapter three's title comes from "me & ur ghost" by Blackbear.  
> Chapter two's title comes from "Reunion" by the XX.  
> Chapter one's title comes from "1StpKlosr" by Linkin Park.  
> The story's title comes from "Violent Noise" by the XX. 
> 
> These are all songs that I associate with Beth and Rio! They also set the tone of each chapter for me.  
> Enjoy the next chapter!

Beth saw them coming through the glass wall and stood up from her seat to get the front door for him. She wished that he came alone but supposed that was her fault that he couldn't drive on his own. He looked so serious. Austere. She could not wait to see the look on his face when he found out how much she made at the end of her first week of selling spas.

"Come in. Go into my office," she said, holding open the main door for them. They took notice of the four cardboard boxes that she had on her desk. Beth followed in after them, took her seat behind the desk and stared up at Rio. "Would you have dinner with me?" she asked, cocking her head to the side as she reached up into the paper bag behind the cardboard boxes. "I got chinese," she said, hoping to entice them.

After giving Mick a careful look, Rio sat down in the chair and Mick followed his lead. Beth smiled at that and pulled forth two takeout containers of fried rice and some plastic forks. She placed one container in front of Rio and the other in front of Mick.

"You got some for me?" Mick asked skeptically, reaching out for the container quickly so she wouldn't take it back. He was starving after all. Whenever they had to pick up from Elizabeth, Rio always had them go late at night.

"Of course, I did. Everybody eats, Mickey," Beth said, smiling politely at him while she took another bite from her own half empty container. Rio finally gave in and picked up his container, taking a small bite before asking her the big question. He had no idea what he would do if she didn't have a good answer. The whole ride to the store he was just begging the universe that she wasn't short.

"How many G's?" he asked cautiously, tapping his foot nervously.

"20," she replied casually.

"20?" he repeated, looking at her as if she sprouted a second head.

"We made about 60 sales in the past 9 days. Every single one financed. High interest rates. Delivery fees. Installation fees. Pool covers, steps, anti bacterial water solution, smart lights, extra powered bubbles... Twenty G's," Beth explained, smirking at him because she only owed him 15k and that was him being generous since it was the first week of selling spas.

"Mick, can you count it, please?" Rio asked politely but he didn't remove his eyes from Beth.

"You don't trust me?" she asked, only slightly offended because it was true that she didn't have a good track record for honesty, but she really wasn't lying. Mick grumbled angrily while he put his food down on the desk and picked up the first box.

"I want to trust you, Elizabeth," Rio said, not paying attention to Mick's gripe over having to count it. They ate together in silence while Mick started to count.

"Who do you eat dinner with?" Beth asked gently.

Rio was borderline suspicious and worried that she was stalling, but carried on eating his fried rice seemingly unbothered. "I'm eating dinner with you, right now, aren't I?" Rio answered sarcastically.

"Who do you watch movies with?" she inquired.

"My son," he answered nonchalantly, dropping her gaze and choosing instead to focus on getting food in his stomach.

"Who do you go on vacations with?" she wondered.

"Do you wish I was dead?" Rio asked, and her eyes flashed in surprise, even Mick took a sharp breath in and looked up, darted his eyes in between them. Then he looked back down and kept counting silently. He wished he would've stayed in the car.

"Why would you even say that? Of course not," she said sincerely, embarassed that he would think that of her when she's been trying so hard. She hoped that he was just pushing buttons.

"But you used to?" he pushed further.

She opened her mouth to say something, then bit her tongue. She thought it over a little more. "And you have never wanted me dead at least once?" she asked. Rio didn't care to answer so he kept on eating instead.

"I saw you one time laughing and kissing a girl in a parking lot. She was really pretty. Had long curly hair and a nice body. Did you watch movies with her?" Beth asked worriedly, looking at him with sad eyes, and he finally made eye contact with her again.  
Rio never thkighs an insecure woman, but he figured that was just a result of being married to possibly the biggest shit in Detroit. He couldn't blame her for that.

"I used to. I been busy lately," Rio answered, watching her as her shoulders relaxed. He let himself imagine her on his couch. Her committing to watching the movie but not being able to resist him. His hands on her waist and her hands on the back of his neck. Her soft lips and gasping breath.

It was nice to talk to someone. It was nice for it to be her.

"It's 20. Five in each box," Mick said, interrupting their weird staring contest and putting the lid back on the last box. God, why didn't Mick stay in the car?

Rio looked back at Beth like he was impressed and it gave her such a sense of pride. She loved being good at what she did, and impressing Rio made it feel even better. He smiled amusedly at her before standing up and leaving the nearly empty container of rice on her desk. Mick followed after him, glad that he was finally gonna be able to go.

"Leave one," Rio said to Mick, and Mick put one of the boxes down. He originally promised her just over two thousand bucks, so she was getting more than double. It was still only 25% of the whole pot but she figured she wasn't in a good position to ask for more. "That's a start up bonus. I'll see you monday," he said before walking out of the office and back to his car.

"Hey, man. Don't make me third wheel on your next date," Mick teased, and Rio smirked.

"You got free food out of it, I wouldn't complain," Rio chuckled, taking one of the boxes from Mick and admiring all the cash. Beth. Always full of bright ideas.

"I'll stop complaining if you'll let her be my girlfriend too," Mick said, making Rio shove him playfully.

\---

The therapist asked Christopher and Elizabeth how their assignment went, what they did, and what was said. Beth went on the whole spiel about how Rio told her more about how the "abuse" affected him and how she swore to leave the man she started seeing during their "break up." What didn't sit right with Dr. Rosenbloom was how Rio sat there silently, letting Beth explain his pain. Once Beth stopped talking, the therapist asked, "Christopher, did you see someone after the abuse?"

Rio looked up at her, having noticed just then he spaced out and heard his name but didn't listen. "What?" Rio asked, slightly embarassed.

"Are you with us, Christopher?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked. Rio nodded his head, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees, folding his arms. "Can you tell me about how you were after Elizabeth hit you?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked.

"I was... I... I saw a psychiatrist after it happened," Rio admitted, rubbing his arms nervously. The therapist could tell that was something Beth just learned.

"Could you tell us more, Christopher, if you feel comfortable discussing it with us?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked gently.

Rio's eyes darted back and forth between Beth and Dr. Rosenbloom. They both looked so... Concerned... Worried...

"I couldn't sleep at night. It was all I thought about for most of the day. I didn't feel normal. I'd never been through something like that and... So, I got a prescription. Serotonin," Rio explained, although it felt so unnatural to him to tell anyone because no one knew except for him. Beth sat back, looking shocked, because she had no idea about any of this. She just assumed that doing what he did, Rio had been shot before, a number of times, before Beth fired at him. The thing was that Rio was the kind of guy who anticipated a problem and behaved proactively. He was remarkably capable of protecting himself from anyone that might want to hurt him. And he always has been. Until he met Beth, who seemed to find a way to break down every single one of his barriers. 

"Do you still take medication, Christopher?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked.

"Yeah," Rio said as he nodded his head. "Sometimes... Well, it's been a while now. It doesn't trigger me as much as it used to," Rio elaborated.

"Are you scared that Elizabeth would try to hurt you again?" the therapist asked. Beth wanted to jump in and say she would never, but she resisted the urge.

"Maybe... I don't know," Rio answered dismissively, thinking back to Elizabeth's confession over the phone about the hit man. 

"The truth is that I have... I have thought about doing it again, but I don't... I don't want to be like that anymore. I don't want to hurt you and I want you to trust me because I care so much about... About you. And I'll do anything to prove it," Beth rambled, breathing hard as she spoke like the words were not coming out fast enough. 

"Every couple goes through issues. I hope to help you survive through this issue, but there will be more in the future because we all make mistakes. Elizabeth, you need to think about how you'll react when you're on the edge next time. Because you can promise that you will never hurt him, and you can do favors for him to prove how much you care, but none of that means anything if you don't consider changing the ways that you cope with conflict in your relationship. Elizabeth, you mentioned that you have issues with Christopher's expectations as a business partner. What are those issues?" Dr. Rosenbloom asked. 

"Well... I feel like his expectations can be too high and that he puts so much pressure on me to fulfill his expectations. He won't take it easy on me when I'm having a hard time. He doesn't give me space to breathe. He doesn't let me be independent with my business and run it on my own terms," Beth spilled out in a form of word vomit. 

"If you want your relationship to thrive, you as well Christopher, will have to think of ways to deal with the problem the next time that Elizabeth disappoints you. You will have to work together to get past the issues that make it hard for you to have a loving and a caring relationship," Dr. Rosenbloom explained, and both of them sat back at a loss for words to say. 

For Rio, it wasn't just that Elizabeth "didn't meet his expectations sometimes" but that when she was short, he couldn't pay up on all his debts either. Elizabeth knew that and she felt like instinctively she had to protect herself if Rio ever retaliated violently because she didn't come back with enough money. For Elizabeth, she struggled with how much freedom Rio gave her and how much he kept her captive. On one hand, working with Rio gave her the opportunity to make her own money and be her own boss without having to answer to Dean. But then working with Rio also meant that the money and the business weren't all hers. 

"Something has to give," Beth said suddenly feeling it all click in her head. "I'm gonna disappoint you and you're gonna suffocate me. So, what, we just have to live with it?" Beth asked sarcastically. 

"You have to consider what matters more to you, each other or each other's mistakes. When you're struggling to see a way out of the conflict, find something that you can do together that can make you feel connected. It can be a shared hobby, a shared experience, it can be sex or just cuddling. Give each other opportunities to share your feelings without judgement and make it your responsibility to listen without thinking of what to say next," Dr. Rosenbloom explained. 

They wondered where to go from here. Because this thing they had was hardly even a relationship, and now that Beth divorced Dean, they were both alone. They led their whole lives stifled, afraid to say what they felt because they didn't think anyone else would care. Sometimes they were unable to understand how they felt in the first place. But this presented an opportunity to learn how to cope with the fear and the confusion together. Beth scooched closer to Rio on the couch and nudged his knee so that he would move his hand. She took it in hers, entwined her fingers through his and squeezed. Her heart raced when she felt him squeeze back immediately. 

"So, I think for your next assignment, you'll try to find something to do when you need to speak honestly with each other. Something that connects you and bonds you together," Dr. Rosenbloom suggested before letting them know their time was up and that she would be seeing them again the same time next week.


	7. Light Reflects From Your Shadow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title comes from the song "Angels" by the XX.

Rio wondered if maybe Mick was right that he should still be trying to take it easy on the job. Call him egotistical but Rio considered himself somewhat of an invincible person. He's always had to work hard. As a kid, he thought that when he _finally_ made it to the top things might get easier for him. In reality, staying at the top was just as much of a struggle as getting there. Mick and his guys tried to downplay how crucial Rio was to the whole operation, but he wasn't dumb. He picked up chatter from all around Michigan that everyone knew Rio got shot, and that it was serious. That he was weak and his gang was slipping. If any of their rivals came after them, whatever blood was shed would be on Rio's hands. He couldn't let that happen to his guys.

So as soon as he came out hiding, Rio went straight back into the game. He, Mick, and two other guys spent the day road tripping to Chicago. Got in some arguments, there was some chasing involved, and slamming someone up against walls. Rio hurt bad, especially in his bad arm and his abdomin. He accidentally dropped his keys and when he bent over to pick them up, he winced in pain. So maybe Mick was right, but it's not as if Rio was selfless enough to admit it. Well, he's been in pain before, and he could handle it. Besides, the physical pain wasn't even the worst of it.

When Rio went to put his keys in his front door, he finally saw that the lock was opened and the door slightly ajar. He reached for the gun at his side and held it up close to his body as he moved the door open fully. The first thing he noticed, his TV was on in his living room. Careful not to make noise, he stealthily approached the wall that divided the foyer from the living room. The second thing he noticed, his living room lights were turned on. The third thing, there was a woman laughing at the TV.

Having heard who it was, he emerged from the behind the wall and made himself known. "What the fuck are you doing, Elizabeth?" he asked incredulously, stepping forward to see Beth with her feet up on his coffee table. He rolled his eyes before going back to the front door quickly and locking it again. "You left the door unlocked, anybody coulda come in here," he scolded her. "And how did you get in?" he asked looking at her with cold, hard eyes. He made sure that his new apartment had windows that locked.

Beth giggled, amused at his attempt to express intimidation. He just looks tired. "Youtube," she answered nonchalantly. She looked up a video for how to pick locks and decided to make herself at home. After these past couple of years, Beth thought she knew Rio reasonably well. And she knew that he wouldn't just ask her to come over for no other reason than just wanting to see her. She suspected that this was the whole reason why Rio wanted her to drive him back to his new apartment instead of telling Mick to pick him up, so that she would know where to find him. So, Beth took the initiative.

Rio walked past her through the living room to his kitchen to get two coronas from his fridge. He popped them open using the bottlecaps and then came back to her, handed her one. "Thanks, but I'm not gonna drink that," Beth said, taking it anyway and putting it on the coffee table for him, and turning the television off. Then he sat down next to her and she scooted closer to him, watched him as he took two big gulps. "How was your day?" she asked softly, lifting her legs up on the couch to get comfortable. Rio drank some more before he answered, almost finished the bottle.

"Fine," he said curtly. Even though he knew that she was looking at him, he directed his gaze at the black tv screen. He felt so tired of having to try so hard to keep up his appearance. Beth raised her hand to Rio's cheek and nudged his head so that he would finally look at her and stop turning away. She leaned forward and kissed him softly while rubbing her finger under his ear. He tasted like beer, but she could cope with that. Rio closed his eyes and kissed back, relaxed his shoulders, let himself sink into the couch, put his hand up on her thigh.

"You don't need to keep up that tough guy exterior for me... Okay?" Beth said once she pulled back. She let her hand fall to his chest and rest there.

Rio took a deep breath in and let it out through his nose. "Fucking awful," he said, in response to the original 'how was your day.' "Me and a few guys drove four hours to Chicago to look for someone that owed us a lot. Over 200 g's. Motherfucker's a huge boxing fan. Kept betting away my money on fights. We had to chase him and fuck him up, and drag him back to the casino to cancel the bet before the fight tomorrow night," Rio explained in more detail.

Beth looked at him with wide eyes. She didn't know what his day-to-day work life was like, because she never asked before, but she didn't think it would be that exciting. He's never had to chase her to another city and fuck her up so that she'd pay. Beth listened intently, trying her best not to think of telling Rio that he should take it easy or that at least she's never gambled away his money. Because she wasn't the boss of him and this wasn't about her. She moved her hand across to his shoulder and squeezed, immediately feeling tension.

"How was your day?" Rio asked, finishing off the bottle and trading it for the full one on the coffee table.

"It was alright. I just sold a few hot tubs. Had lots of awkward interactions with my ex-husband where I had to tell him that he wasn't making hard enough sells after two couples left the store without buying anything after looking around for over half an hour," she said as she continued rubbing his shoulder.

"You thought of firing him?" he asked quietly as his eyes slipped close and he concentrated on the sound of her voice and the feeling of her hands.

"I would if it wasn't for him needing a biweekly paycheck to pay for my kids' food, books, clothes. But I hope someday I'll be able to take care of them on my own and not have to worry about him keeping a job," she said. Then she took away his beer bottle and set it on the counter. Beth lifted her legs to straddle him and sit on his lap so that she would be better able to massage both his shoulders at the same time. Rio's hands attached themselves to her waist. 

"You'll get there soon, ma," Rio mumbled quietly. breathing in Beth's perfume now that she was closer to him. Her hands felt amazing on him, and not just because of the tension in his shoulders. For a while, Rio didn't think he would ever be able to face her again, and he was really happy to be here with her. He ran his hands up her back, and she kissed him again, slowly, deliberately, like he could break if she was too rough with him. When she moved to pull away, he bit her lip to get her to stay, and she rubbed her fingers deeper into his shoulder and the back of his neck. "I love you, Elizabeth," Rio whispered once he let go of her lip. Beth smiled and leaned in again to kiss him more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who came along for this ride with me! I hope you enjoyed the story. Next week, I wanna start a pride series with a Beth/Ruby fic, and I wanna do some crossovers with other fandoms as well. If you have something you want to read, drop a comment or send me a message, and I'll let you know if I can do it.


End file.
